DINH DOONG

In an unexpected twist that has caught the attention of media analysts and ignited discussions on social media, Elon Musk is allegedly contemplating the acquisition of ABC, aiming to “set things straight.” Consistent with Musk’s bold approach, initial reports suggest he intends to oust longtime ABC anchor David Muir, the prominent face of World News Tonight. This decision appears to stem from Muir’s involvement in the contentious presidential debate between Donald Trump and Kamala Harris, where Musk claims Muir “crossed the line” in his moderation.

“ABC is broken. Journalism is broken. And who better to fix it than me?” Musk allegedly expressed during a private chat with associates. “David Muir is only the beginning. ABC needs a reboot, and I’m here to hit the reset button.”

Although Musk has yet to formally confirm these plans, the news has unleashed a torrent of speculation regarding the potential impact of a billionaire’s hand on a major news outlet. Known for his unpredictable ventures—from launching rockets through SpaceX to transforming Twitter/X—Musk’s latest consideration could herald a significant evolution in mainstream media.

The possibility of this acquisition began to take shape during the recent presidential debate, moderated by Muir and fellow ABC journalist Linsey Davis. This debate, characterized by intense back-and-forth exchanges between Donald Trump and Kamala Harris, triggered widespread backlash, particularly regarding how the moderators handled Trump’s responses.

During the debate, Muir confronted Trump on numerous occasions, questioning his statements on critical issues from immigration to the economy. By contrast, Harris experienced fewer interruptions, a disparity that did not escape Trump’s supporters, including Musk.

“The moderators were completely biased,” Musk tweeted post-debate. “It felt like watching a fixed game, and David Muir was the referee who had a stake in the outcome.”

For Musk, this debate exemplified the flaws plaguing contemporary journalism: partisan reporting, slanted moderation, and a clear absence of impartial coverage. What began as a critique of Muir post-debate has rapidly evolved into an ambitious campaign to seize control of one of America’s largest news organizations.

Musk’s disruption of industries is well-documented. Whether redefining electric vehicles, advancing space exploration, or transforming social media, he consistently challenges the status quo. Now, it appears he has turned his sights on media, where he believes substantial innovation is required.

“ABC is mired in outdated practices,” Musk reportedly stated among friends. “Their news coverage and debate moderation are relics of the past. Trust in the media is dwindling, and rightly so. It’s time we revamp that.”

What might Musk’s ABC look like? Sources indicate his vision includes a fusion of traditional journalism with revolutionary technology, featuring AI news anchors, instantaneous fact-checking via algorithms, and interactive viewer engagement during broadcasts through Twitter/X.

Furthermore, insiders reveal Musk is contemplating the integration of SpaceX and Tesla updates into ABC’s programming, offering viewers exclusive insights into rocket launches, electric vehicle advancements, and possibly live coverage on his aspirations to colonize Mars.

“I want to propel news into the future,” Musk articulated. “Imagine tuning into a news broadcast while receiving real-time updates from space. That’s our direction.”

At the core of Musk’s media aspirations is the potential termination of David Muir, a longstanding staple of ABC News. While many viewers identify Muir with journalistic credibility, Musk sees him as emblematic of the pervasive issues within mainstream media.

“Muir’s a relic,” Musk allegedly remarked in a private gathering. “He’s been operating the same way for years, and it’s no longer engaging. The future of news lies beyond a suit reciting a teleprompter. It should be vibrant, interactive, and, crucially, impartial.”

Muir has yet to publicly comment on the speculation surrounding Musk’s buyout or the possibility of his dismissal. Those close to the anchor suggest he approaches the situation calmly, aware that Musk’s plans have yet to solidify.

“David has extensive experience in this field,” an ABC insider shared. “He can navigate pressure effectively and won’t let a billionaire tech mogul push him out easily.”

Still, the notion of Musk purchasing ABC—and displacing Muir—has rippled through the network, galvanizing a split among staff. Some express unease regarding the implications for journalistic integrity, while others eagerly anticipate the prospect of working under a visionary as unpredictable as Musk.

As rumors of Musk’s potential ABC acquisition circulate, public response has been predictably polarized. Musk’s supporters, particularly those critical of traditional media, see this as a necessary upheaval of a flawed system.

“At last, someone is ready to challenge the media!” a Musk supporter tweeted. “David Muir’s been coasting for far too long. It’s time for genuine change, and Musk is the catalyst for that.”

Conversely, skeptics caution that Musk’s ownership of a major news network could threaten journalism’s integrity. Given Musk’s history of clashes with reporters and controlling the narrative on Twitter/X, fears arise that ABC could devolve into a mere propaganda outlet under his guidance.

“Elon Musk at the helm of a news network? What could possibly go awry?” a journalist sarcastically observed. “This is a man who blocks reporters for asking difficult questions. Just imagine his control over ABC.”

While speculation about Musk’s plans to acquire ABC and terminate David Muir remains unverified, the concept has undoubtedly sparked public intrigue. Will Musk actualize his ambition to reshape the network, or is this merely another case of the billionaire seeking attention?

Time will reveal the outcome, but given Musk’s history, we can anticipate numerous surprises ahead. After all, this is the visionary who redefined Twitter/X, revolutionized the automotive sector, and set humanity’s sights on Mars. If anyone can mold ABC into the media of tomorrow, it’s likely Musk.

For now, ABC employees, including David Muir, find themselves contemplating whether they will soon report to the world’s wealthiest individual—and what that might entail for journalism’s future.

NOTE: This is SATIRE, It’s Not True.